My boyfriend doesn’t care about me anymore

I don't know whether I should believe my boyfriend. He swears he's in love with me, but sometimes I feel like he doesn't care. He doesn't do anything; it just seems like he's not really with me, not really HERE. It makes me feel ignored and, sometimes, used...but I could be imagining it. Help..?

Here's our take on the whole issue:
You're definitely not imagining how your relationship is making you feel. This issue can, in some ways, be one of the most difficult to deal with because it's not like he's doing something that's outwardly rude or intolerable (like getting physical with you or cheating on you or something). But when you're getting ignored, that can be a form of abuse and betrayal as well. Trust your instincts and let him know how his attitude toward your relationship is making you feel: alone, insignificant and invisible. Let him know how his actions (or lack thereof) are impacting you and your life. If he isn't willing to work on things and address the deeper, underlying issues in your relationship, then you might need to walk away.

What do you think?

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20 comments

What others are saying

Boys are idiots. Dey av no feelingz at all. My bf is owt wiv his mates while am in bed upset n lonely dno wah to do. He’s avoiding my calls n has had me waiting a few hours. Av been wiv him 6yrz n pass few dayz I feel as if he’s avoiding me. Av askd him y. Told him go ur own way. But he doesn’t want to end it. But he’s not makin me happy either. Help I dno wa to do. I luv him n can’t imagine life wivowt him. But cryin at nyts bein all alone n upset n him neva der 4 me iz driving me crazy :-( I want uz to be perfect. But its happening I dno wa to do

comment by so confused at 9:25 pm

My relation from 2 years. And I was just brokup, but i steel love her from my truely heart, but she don’t love me, she was like other person. What i do for come back her in my life. I can’t live without her.

comment by Ravi at 1:01 am

How long have you been dating because if it’s less then six months he probley doesn’t mean it. Sorry to break it to but that doesn’t mean he doesnt care about you maybe he’s just haven’t a hard time showing you. Maybe he’s showing you how much he cares through the small things that he does for you. Whatever happends I hope it’s to your liking

comment by kevin at 6:56 pm

Hi am here for u and i will allways be

comment by Lewis adzah at 4:56 pm

Love is two hearts living in one soul. When doubt arises it will ruin your whole life. So be very careful to handle. Boys escape. It is disrespect to your family

comment by Umapathy at 12:05 pm

most of time you who is in the relationship can tell if he still loves you or not in this case i think he just needs treatment,try withdrawing a bit and see if he will notice?? if he doesnt he is not into you if he does he was just playing up,taking you for granted and depends on how you handle it theres still something there!!!

comment by olivia sankhani at 4:30 am

Words are only one form of communication that humans use with each other. Sometimes the words are right but everything else feels wrong. There is an emotional energy that some people are more aware of than others that gives those people a read on the emotional communication going on between them and the people around them. Emotional energy communication is usually very hard to fake compared to words so it can be much more reliable to get a true read on what someone is really thinking and feeling. I would trust your feelings and not your boyfriends words. Get him to communicate more and be more emotionally sincere about what he is saying.

comment by christopher cyr at 3:03 am

hi everyone!!

comment by hiromi kojenn orbita at 11:50 pm

I have the same problem with my boyfriend right now. Everyone is saying that I need a break from him and I think so to but we just came out of a break. And I felt so lane not talking to him. I do love him. But he has been acting like a big jerk to me. It’s like he doesn’t Care for our relationship at all anymore. I just really think he is playing with my emotions. Being with him makes me happy but I feel like he isn’t happy. I says that he trust me but then he ays he doesn’t know if he trust me. I don’t trust him after he played with that one girls emotions. I feel like I’ve been betrayed and played with. Ive been going out with him for a year and this started happening a week after our one year anniversary. I’m done with this but I love him to much to do anything drastic and he won’t talk to me really about it.

comment by Kayla at 3:35 pm

girl u do the same to him and see how he feels then he doesnt do anything dump his sorry ass then when u are out and he is there dress up in heels and a mini skirt a tube top u are ready to go

comment by sharon at 1:07 pm

in love people never swear it only people have to prove it dat he is in love with you ..if he is really ignored u then u dunt have to find reason it just u have 2 feel why???to find reason or expect more reason or stay in hope dat he gonna say reason oneday ..all these gonna make u weak u will never know coz i was in same sitution i try alot to know or find out why he ignored or not doing anything but i couldnot find reason behind it just time is great healer it shows all the way and i got reason was behind was next gurl but it was too late n hard for me to understand him and was damn hard to break upp…but watever happens,,happens for gud ,,never find a reason by urself wat??some relation break wth no reason so i did break wth him wth no words coz i dunt want to break relation wth a reason that keeps u make remember n hurtsss….so therefore just be happy and give ur life chance to be fresh never stay in hope for the reason just u have to feel and understand if he wants to go then let him ..if he come back then it ursss take cared a best wishes frm me..be strong gurl

comment by yasmin at 11:03 am

either he has a secret issue or an affair

comment by nahla at 10:39 am

we are same situation now.i feel ignored too,i keep trying to contact him sending messages,exposing my real feelings to him but still no responsed,i felt bad because he never say any words.he is so distance and cold.its like he never care my feelings he knows i do a lot of effort just to connect but never ever single words from he said we are over.he just put on keep guessing the situation,,,help?

comment by charelyn at 9:30 am

sometime life is really unfair but one thing is your ability to stand firm count your strength an your quality so be your self

comment by fred at 6:07 am

Why you not ask him? It may hurt for you both if keep like this.Just try to talk with him.Maybe he have his own reason.

comment by Veronique Gloria at 5:22 am

i know how you feel, i kinda have the same problem. or did. my boyfren never wanted to go out or do anything as a couple. time made things different. i kept asking why wont you do anything with me? are you embarrassed of me? n he came to realize that he coulda lost me. you just gotta make it clear to him that if hes not gonna step up;; someone else will.

comment by rachael at 1:43 pm

you need new boyfriend …….

comment by raman at 9:59 am

you could be, but it seems that you aren’t. so, i say don’t bother

comment by daltonfader at 11:28 pm

Might be you dont bilive him,Just think he is made for you but dont show it,be with him but try to show & sayhim you can walk without him,you will achive soon

comment by Sujit at 12:54 pm

u should test his love going out with him lokin terrible if he comments nagatively or looks at u strange or looks embaressed then he doesnt love u

comment by archeline at 12:48 pm