Are Hilary and Mike In For Wedded Bliss?

Edmonton Oilers center Mike Comrie and singer/actress/Disney survivor Hilary Duff tied the knot this past weekend, and holy-crap-on-a-maple-leaf did they do it in style. The bride was radiant in Vera Wang, while the groom wore his favorite mouthguard. (Bah-dum-bump-CHING. We’ll be here all week. Tip your waitress.)

In all seriousness, they did it up right. A Montecito mansion. A sunset ceremony. Oh–and let’s not forget the 4.5-carat, radiant-cut engagement ring. (And yes; that sound you just heard was us swooning.) It’s hard to be anything other than glowy when you’re faced with seven-digit jewelry and brand-new nuptials, but does the happy couple have what it takes for a long-term face-off? Moonit’s on the case.

See what Moonit had to say about another hockey player named Mike and his blonde newlywed.

According to Moonit’s analysis, Hilary (born on September 28, 1987) and Mike (born on September 11, 1980) are in for a “sexy-time explosion.” Their readout reveals that, “there’s some kind of connection there, but it’s decidedly skin deep.” This superficiality might suggest shaky ground, but their assessment goes on to say that, “these two don’t even need to speak the same language; they can communicate sufficiently well for themselves on raw passion alone. Who needs words when you’ve got Victoria’s Secret on hand?” (Case in point: right after Comrie proposed, the paparazzi snapped some bedroom footage of Hilary “thanking” Mike.)

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Any downsides? “Even though these two have a good helping of physical stamina, they’re not going to be running any mental marathons together.” To that we say: so what? We’re guessing the cute-as-a-button pop tart and her caring Canuck aren’t exactly yearning for deep, soul-searching discussions, and besides–when they’re together, they “laugh [their] heads off.” Moonit concludes the duo’s destiny report with some happy news: “there’s a good chance they’ll be able to keep themselves entertained in the bedroom for years on end.” That sounds like a recipe for marital bliss to us.