George Clooney’s a touchy subject. For a time, it seemed like the world was pretty much ready to knife-fight any aspiring Clooney love interest, so we were especially surprised when Italian model-turned-actress Elisabetta Canalis decided that she was here to stay. Although the media tried to slam her, Canalis managed to rise above the trash talk, and has kept George’s heart a-flutter since 2009.

But now, after a surprising admission on CNN’s “Piers Morgan Tonight,” we wonder how fluttery the couple can really be. Basically, George confirmed that he’s not the marrying kind, which came as a big ol’ shock to Canalis. According to reports, “she thought she was going to be the girl who would finally get George to settle down and put a ring on it.”

Yut-yoh. The rumor mill goes on to say that, “if he doesn’t ask her to marry him soon she will ask him…and if he says no, well there are plenty more fish in the ocean.” Yut-yoh times two. With all this drama, can Canalis and Clooney make things work? Moonit’s ready to find out.

According to their birth date analysis, George (born on May 6, 1961) “might want to keep” Elisabetta (born on September 12, 1978) around. Their reading insists that Elisabetta “is well worth his time,” and that they “have a ton of potential to not only play well but also work well together; their combined energy is through the roof.”

So, what makes these two such a dynamic duo? “George has the initiative and energy needed to get anything done,” especially when combined with Elisabetta’s “ever-present optimism, planning skills and ability to charm the pants off anyone around.”  It can be “really rewarding when they accomplish things together, and it’s especially beneficial for their relationship.”

Whether George realizes this or not, Elisabetta “secretly admires the fact that he’s such a ‘doer,’” and George is “lucky to have someone like her to keep him motivated all the time.”

Sounds pretty good, right? There’s even more goodness: these two have “the ability to bring out the absolute best in each other, whether it’s working on a project, planning a wedding or trip, playing on a team, making a home improvement or raising kids.” Could the vocally wedding-shy bachelor make an exception? Sigh. Let’s keep our fingers crossed.

It’s been a long time since we could really dish about the royal family, so we’re a little rusty at this. Here goes: “Pip, pip, old chap! Dost thou seest thine bloody lift to the loo? Bangers and mash. Also: Parliament.”

On second thought, maybe we should just deal with the details. As you may have heard from the 16 kabillion news sources covering the story, Prince William proposed to long-time on-again, off-again girlfriend Kate Middleton. (SPOILER ALERT: she said yes.)

Now, the middle-class Kate, an anomaly in royal circles, is sporting Diana’s ring, and the world’s prepping for what may be the biggest wedding in history. With that kind of three-ring circus in store, it must be tough for Kate. Even after eight-ish years with William, this is kicking up her media (and royal family) exposure a huge notch. Will she be able to ride out the storm, or is this relationship as steady as a house of (commons) cards?

According to their birth date analysis, Prince William (born on June 21, 1982) and Kate (born on January 9, 1982) have a “rent, but don’t necessarily buy” thing going on. This relationship is “as tempting as a cherry red, vintage Ferrari.” What we mean is, we’d “recommend taking it for a spin around the block, but not going ahead and purchasing it any time soon…otherwise, you can find yourself with a high-priced problem on your hands.”

Don’t get us wrong–the attraction is undeniable, “the sparks are definitely there, and that makes for some hot and heavy hook-ups.” William and Kate are actually “similar in a lot of ways and can be worthy opponents, so the feisty flirting can be fun and keep both of them on their toes.”

After a while, though, they might realize that “they don’t have as much interest in what’s really going on under the hood.” Obviously, this can “put a damper on a long-term relationship,” but there’s a chance that they can “ride on the physical fumes alone for quite a while.” No wonder they’ve been together so long. We hope they can turn their bedroom chemistry into something legit, because having your split covered by every network in the world? Not so much fun.

It’s hard to believe, but every now and again, Moonit HQ needs to take a little break from the glamorous world of celebrity infidelity and Tinseltown baby bumps. We block Perez Hilton on IM, hole up in our library, kick back with some Debussy and a copy of the Financial Times, and enjoy a snifter of gently-warmed brandy. (We even wear glasses, because that’s how academic we are. And we also use words like academic. )

It’s because of this temporary tabloid hiatus that we read up on Republican mover-shaker Mitt Romney and gubernatorial candidate Meg Whitman. Romney, the former Governor of Massachusetts, and Whitman, a hopeful for the California seat, go waaaaay back. In fact, Romney claims to have personally hired Whitman at consulting firm Bain & Co. in the early ’80s, and he and Whitman have been platonically, politically inseparable ever since. Can Romney’s approval push Whitman over the edge, or will he distance himself from the former eBay CEO?

According to their birth dates, Mitt (born on March 12, 1947) and Meg (born on August 4, 1956) are like their “own personal trainers.” We’ll explain. You know how, when you’re working out, you push much harder when you have a gym buddy? These two act as “part-trainer and part-spotter” for each other, and they’re “always offering up a little friendly competition.” As they take their shots at rising through the ranks, they’re “the ideal partner to root each other on, bump each other up, and help each other make it to the top.”

Take a look inside Mitt’s marriage to Ann Davies…

Their relationship assessment goes on to say that they “should be able to weather any storms that pop up along the way…at the end of the day, they appreciate each other.” Plus, they’re both “acutely aware of how much they need the other person to help guarantee their ultimate success.” This recognition is especially important to spur Mitt on since he’s got a “strong need for emotional security.”

Get the newest Hollywood celebrity dating pics and celeb gossip…

The basis for their partnership stems from their “deep mutual respect and unparalleled integrity.” Because they both “value these traits so highly,” they have a “tendency to separate from the folks who…don’t.” Since a “big part of their professional success is keeping up appearances,” they ought to “be aware of the tendency to withdraw from the broader group,” and they should “remember that their actions can have just as much impact as their intentions.” It looks like their charmed friendship can weather the upcoming election after all.

About a month ago, we were psyched to see Levi Johnston spend some more quality time around Bristol Palin and their baby Tripp. But, like many of you, we were a bit surprised to hear that the once-engaged couple was rumored to be dating again. It’s gotta be tough to see your ex-fiancee use up his five minutes of fame by talking smack about your family and dropping his drawers for PlayGirl.

So you can imagine our shock to hear the news that Levi proposed to Bristol at her condo in Anchorage a few short weeks ago. The seemingly immature 20 year-old has apparently turned over a new family-man leaf, saying “… I am here now, and I’m going to make it right.” Does this relationship have the tenacity of a hockey mom or is it just another bridge to nowhere?

According to their birth date analysis, Bristol (born on October 18, 1990) can’t help but be into Levi (born on May 3, 1990). No matter how many times he publicly trash talks the Palin clan, Bristol’s “defenseless against the really strong pull he’s got on her.”

Check out another couple that recently got engaged.

We can’t believe we’re saying this, but apparently, Levi was “put on this earth to make sure she achieves her true potential.” Could it be for realsies? (And what’s that chill in the air? Did hell just freeze over?) Bristol’s already turned this clunker of a situation into a cash cow; she’s become a “teen abstinence ambassador,” a high-earning speaker, and she’s even making a cameo in an upcoming July episode of ABC Family’s teen show, The Secret Life of the American Teenager.

Even still, not everything’s roses and champagne. These two still have some major issues, and “things are going to be intense whenever they’re together.” With “two forces as powerful as both of them, it’s not going to be a cake-walk.” It doesn’t help that Bristol’s “temper has a way of flaring every now and then,” which definitely adds to the heat.

That being said, “any disagreements and drama along the way are a small price to pay for becoming a more mature and evolved person.” It’s important for them to “make the most of this relationship” because “something like this doesn’t come around too many times.” (Again: color us shocked.)

See what’s in store for your relationships on Moonit!

Bristol needs to “take any constructive criticism he offers in stride” and ignore any “petty jealousies and rivalries…They’ve got too much at stake here for Bristol to let her temper mess it all up.” Wow. We’re glad they’re a good match, but Bristol? Levi? Promise us we won’t be seeing any “Tripp in 2052″ posters, okay?

Poor Bristol Palin. First off, her mom is, you know, her mom. Secondly, she may have had the most public unwed-teen-mom-drama in history. And thirdly, the baby daddy was Levi Johnston. He’s cute and all, but Levi (a.k.a. King of the DudeBros) was far from camera-ready, and while respected news sources were courting Bristol for her side of the story, Levi was courted by…Playgirl. (Couldn’t he have held out until Penthouse came a-callin’?)

But things aren’t all bad. Levi’s been laying off the centerfolds, and spending a lot more quality time around Bristol and baby Tripp. Since the once-engaged couple are rumored to be dating again, Moonit’s ready to find out if this relationship has the tenacity of a hockey mom, or if it’s just another bridge to nowhere.

According to their birth date analysis, Bristol (born on October 18, 1990) can’t help but be into Levi (born on May 3, 1990). No matter how many times he publicly trash talks the Palin clan, Bristol’s “defenseless against the really strong pull he’s got on her.”

We can’t believe we’re saying this, but apparently, Levi was “put on this earth to make sure she achieves her true potential.” Could it be for realsies? (And what’s that chill in the air? Did hell just freeze over?) Bristol’s already turned this clunker of a situation into a cash cow; she’s become a “teen abstinence ambassador,” a high-earning speaker, and she’s even making a cameo in an upcoming July episode of ABC Family’s teen show, The Secret Life of the American Teenager.

Even still, not everything’s roses and champagne. These two still have some major issues, and “things are going to be intense whenever they’re together.” With “two forces as powerful as both of them, it’s not going to be a cake-walk.” It doesn’t help that Bristol’s “temper has a way of flaring every now and then,” which definitely adds to the heat.

That being said, “any disagreements and drama along the way are a small price to pay for becoming a more mature and evolved person.” It’s important for them to “make the most of this relationship” because “something like this doesn’t come around too many times.” (Again: color us shocked.)

See what’s in store for your relationships on Moonit!

Bristol needs to “take any constructive criticism he offers in stride” and ignore any “petty jealousies and rivalries…They’ve got too much at stake here for Bristol to let her temper mess it all up.” Wow. We’re glad they’re a good match, but Bristol? Levi? Promise us we won’t be seeing any “Tripp in 2052″ posters, okay?

We love that former VP Al Gore has become BFFs with Mother Nature, because someone needs to speak up for the ol’ gal. Sadly, there must only be room for one lady in his life, because he’s separating from wife, Tipper. (Remember her? She’s best known as the scourge of mildly racy ’80s music.)

Why does the dissolution of their marriage make us feel like our parents are splitting up? Maybe it’s because Al’s referred to his wife of forty years as, “someone I’ve loved with my whole heart since the night of my high school senior prom.” Sniffle and sadness! Moonit’s finding out why these high-school-sweethearts-turned-political-powerhouse called it quits after all these years.

Moonit’s got nothin’ but love for these two, and it’s no wonder they accomplished more in their four decades together than most of us could in multiple lifetimes. According to their birth date analysis, Tipper (born on August 19, 1948) and Al (born on March 31, 1948) are always ready to contribute some serious elbow grease.

“No Do-It-Yourself project is too big for the two of them. No matter how large or small the task at hand may be, he’s willing to take the initiative and has the energy to see just about anything through to completion.” And Tipper seems to be the perfect complement to his hard-core resolve; she’s got “this never-ending optimism to spare, lays out plans like no other and never met a social calendar she didn’t like.”

When things get tough, Tipper “motivates him to keep his chin up and works some serious magic in the organizational department.” Moonit goes on to say that, when you “put these two together, they’re like an all-purpose power tool on steroids; they’re great at building, renovating or deconstructing just about anything–be it a joint project, a community service endeavor or even a wedding.”

To send the point home, Moonit says that Tipper and Al “have the ability to bring out the absolute best in each other, and like most great teams, it’s really rewarding for them to accomplish things together. They also thoroughly appreciate each other… she quietly admires his ‘get it done’ attitude and he’s smart enough to realize he couldn’t have gotten anything done without her.”

Wow. This split just doesn’t make sense. Now that their four adult children are living their own lives (and Al’s political career is kaput), could it be that this duo simply ran out of fixer-uppers?

When we think about presidential love lives, we think of scandals… affairs… inappropriately used cigars… Maybe that’s why the world at large can’t seem to get enough of the happy anomaly that is Barack and Michelle. Even notoriously fickle media outlets are on board with their lovefest. The New York Times Magazine is devoting an upcoming issue to their wedded bliss and Michelle’s dishing out dating advice in December’s Glamour. (Although she is the First Lady, her relationship insights are still pretty relatable to us common folk. We wish we could say the same about Martha Washington’s “Wooden Teeth are Sexy” or Mamie Eisenhower’s “101 Ways to Woo With Fudge.”)

With our curiosity piqued, we decided it was high time we peeked inside the White House love nest. According to Moonit’s birth date analysis, the Obamas are a “match made in heaven.” Their relationship assessment goes on to indicate that they “have it all: they’re physically attracted to each other, they provide each other with unwavering emotional support, and they dig each other’s vibe.”

They’ve managed to keep up with their standing Friday date nights, but there’s got to be more to their 17 years of success than that, right? Moonit’s reading reveals that, “they’re both great at identifying with each other, they instinctively understand each other’s needs and moods, and they can practically finish each other’s sentences. It’s essentially like dating your best friend… who you want to see naked.”

As far as their long-term friendship goes, Moonit’s reading says they, “complement each other perfectly,” but that Michelle pretty much wears the pants; “she’s the Roger Clemens to his Jorge Posada. While she’s at the center of the show, barking orders and pitching a no-hitter, he’s guiding her, catching what she’s throwing, and backing her up with strong, quiet support.” As surprising as this may seem–especially considering that he’s the most powerful man in the free world–the President himself has admitted that, “my staff worries a lot more about what the first lady thinks than they worry about what I think.”

So, how do the Obamas fare from a professional perspective? According to Moonit, “no matter how difficult the task or challenging the project, you two always seem to come up with a perfect solution. He can really shine when you’re around, and you’re great at helping him achieve his true potential.” Obama’s half-sister, Maya Soetoro-Ng, seems to agree; when asked what her sister-in-law has contributed to Obama’s career, her response was simply, “forward propulsion.” Here’s to hoping we feel some of the halo effects of all this positivity!