When you spend months and months working on a intense psychosexual thriller, it kind of makes sense that you would bond with your cast and crew. Like, really bond…in the naked way. As it turns out, Natalie Portman’s not only engaged to Black Swan choreographer Benjamin Millepied, but the two are expecting their first baby.

Can their chemistry live past the drama and excitement of the movie set? If the Best Actress Curse is to be believed, scoring an Academy Award means tanking a relationship (think Sandra Bullock, Kate Winslet and Reese Witherspoon, whose relationships fell apart within a year of their Best Actress wins). And Moonit recently predicted that Natalie might fall victim to the Oscar curse based on her romantic relationship analysis with Ben.

According to their birth dates, Natalie (born on June 9, 1981) and Benjamin (born on June 10, 1977) have an ideal working relationship. Their professional reading says that, “simply put, when they’re together, these two geniuses can help each other broaden their mental capacity tenfold.”

Because Natalie’s “willing to listen to, accept and support his ideas,” she can “reap some serious benefits from his brilliance.” In turn, her “open-mindedness helps him better express his thoughts, making him more communicative than he would normally be.”

Sounds great, right? Sure, but they’re in for some communication issues on the lovey-dovey front. Their romantic assessment reveals that “these two communicate about as well as Jean-Claude Van Damme and Arianna Huffington.”

Their reading goes on to say that “unless one of them is a mind reader, they’re probably going to need to learn how to express their feelings to one another like grown ups.”

It’s “hard enough to nurture a relationship,” and “even tougher to go the distance if you don’t know how to convey what you need to the person you care about.” Yikes. Let’s hope they view this baby as a joint business venture…

Justin Bieber is in loooooooooooove. (You cannot see it, but right now, you can find us smushing our index fingers together like they are kissing and doing the ooooooOOOOOO sound.) So how do we know that Justin’s Trapper Keeper totally has “Mr. Selena Gomez” and “Mr. Selena Gomez-Bieber” and “Mr. Justin Selena Gomez Bieber, Esq.” scrawled all over it?

Two days after Valentine’s Day, Bieber basically bought out an entire florist and had the contents delivered to Selena’s home. (Multiple truckloads of flowers seriously trump the spelling-out-her-name-in-rose-petals thing. Way to make us look like cheap jerks, Bieber.) Can Justin sustain these major romantic gestures, or will he and Selena wilt faster than a house filled with flora? Moonit’s ready to find out.

According to their birth dates, Justin (born on March 1, 1994) and Selena (born on July 22, 1992) are “cosmically compelled to find each other interesting.” Whether it’s because of “those mysterious gazes or that witty banter,” Selena and Justin are “sufficiently curious” and truly want “to find out more about each other.”

Although Justin’s probably been asking his friends “what’s her deal, anyway,” the seemingly shy Selena is more likely to put the wheels in motion. Unfortunately, that might not be the best thing for Justin’s career. According to one source, “…it angers young teens that he’s been seen out with Selena,” so even though Justin’s “curious,” he’s “less likely to put himself out there.”

The verdict? “Unless Justin’s up for getting involved, he shouldn’t wink back;” there’s no easy way out, because “this relationship will be super intense.” (“Super intense”—as in, say, filling your girlfriends’ house with flowers? To us, that sounds less like “passion” and more like “stalking,” but who are we to judge?) Ah, well. At least for now, the tiny teen titans seem to be pretty psyched to be together, which means Selena’s just going to have to get used to the massive teen-girl demand for Selena Gomez voodoo dolls.

Not long ago, we were all, Yay, super-stud Ryan Phillippe! Yay for getting together with adora-blonde Amanda Seyfried! You guys should kiss on the mouth and hold hands and fall in hearts and make teh babiez! Now, we’re reeling it in a little, because sweet hey-zoos in heaven, that Phillippe is one slippery character. Just last week, Ryan was trying to put a little something-something together with Rihanna, who was Not. Having It.

According to Us Weekly, “he said something to the effect of, ‘What are you doing tonight?’ and she signaled ’sleep,’…She was trying to be polite, but she was genuinely not interested.” (Hee. Smooth move, Ex Lax.) Anywhoo, we can’t feel too bad for Seyfried; sources say her hook-ups with Ryan are just that—hook-ups. Since the two are keeping things pretty low-key, we wonder if they’ll every change their minds and make things exclusive. (Babiez? Please with the babiez?) Could an unexpected long-term commitment be in their future? Moonit’s on the case.

According to their birth dates, Ryan (born on September 10, 1974) and Amanda (born on December 3, 1985) are “giving Fabio a run for his money.” What we mean to say is that, “if you could de-cheezify those vistas you see on the covers of romance novels — the ones where a rippling stud gazes longingly at his ladylove–that would be these two.” Except they’re the real-deal version. And they’ve got way better hair.

Ryan and Amanda’s romantic assessment goes on to say that, “even if this explosive chemistry was their only asset, they’d probably get along just fine.” The cool part is, it’s not just about the heat; “these two are genuinely into each other, and they care enough to be inventive about showing their appreciation.”

Because Amanda’s “able to be herself” around Ryan, her approach is so “open and genuine” that it totally puts him at ease. And Ryan’s ideas–even the ones that don’t pertain to the bedroom–are “awesome enough that she’s all about them.”

All this positivity also means they might be well-suited as friends or co-workers, but as Moonit forewarns, “if you guys team up as a professional pair, you’ll need to keep the smooches out of the office and your eyes on the books.” It’s best to be vigilant about maintaining separate worlds for business and pleasure; when you two let them mix, things could get kind of complicated. Just ask Siegfried and Roy…

As you probably heard, there is much sadness in Simpsonland. (Not the Homer-and-Bart-style Universal Studios Simpsonland. Although, now that we mention it, it might be awesome if Jessica and Ashlee had their own theme park. Would it be filled with games like, “Avoid the Creepy, Overly-Involved Dad?” “Whack-a-John-Mayer?” “Damage Control: Lip-Sync Your Way Through A Live, Nationally-Televised Broadcast?” We can only dream.)

Anyway, as we said earlier, Ashlee Simpson is a sad, sad lady, mostly because “irreconcilable differences” have put a divorce-shaped wedge between her and Pete Wentz. Sure, their three years of wedlock haven’t been totally trouble-free, but we were hoping that they’d learn to work it out. (Perhaps they could still kick off the healing with a name change for their toddler, Bronx Mowgli…) Unfortunately, the legal-type papers have been inked and stamped, and here we are, wondering why these pop icons are really calling it quits.

According to Moonit, Ashlee (born on October 3, 1984) and Pete (born on June 5, 1979) were in for a “picture perfect life.” Once upon a time, their romantic prognosis looked pretty sweet; they “had amazing potential for creating their own ideal world,” and “the key was in their ability to tell each other exactly what they wanted in the most diplomatic way possible.”

During the good times, Ashlee and Pete’s strong suit was their ability to “communicate with each other, and since no one had to beat around the bush or throw a fit to get what they needed, there was no weird, passive-aggressive behavior or nasty manipulation.” Their positivity even spread to the people around them, and when they were “psyched about each other, it was like they emitted waves of happiness that washed over friends and family.”

Hold up—“white picket fences…everything on the up-and up”…this doesn’t exactly sound like the makings of lawyers and community property. What gives? Maybe the rift was rooted in Ashlee and Pete’s fundamental friendship, which ranked a paltry 19% on the platonic compatibility scale.

According to Moonit, when it came to “seeing eye-to-eye,” these two weren’t exactly on the same page. While it’s fine to “disagree…you shouldn’t dictate how the other person should lead their life…but that’s exactly what you were inclined to do.” Yikes. Unfortunately, “Pete felt like he was being judged all the time…so it was tough for him to be himself or feel like sharing…ever.” We hope these two are better off going their separate ways, and given their analysis, we hope they’ll never decide to “just be friends.”

No, we’re not talking about Scott Disick, although Kim happens to be super compatible with her sister Kourtney’s baby daddy (And yes, we checked. We’re gross like that). Kim Kardashian and NBA power forward Kris Humphries have only been dating since November, but since “celeb-u-taunt time” is comparable to “dog years,” 90 days is more like 18 months. That must be why he’s been ring shopping (which, whaaa?) and she’s been jockeying for a meet-the-parents moment.

A few nights ago, Kim hosted an intimate birthday dinner for Kris, his folks, and a few others at New York’s STK. (We should mention that, not eight months ago, Kim dragged ex-BF Miles Austin there for his birthday party. We know she’s a little…limited, but Kim? Honey? There’s more than one restaurant in New York. Get your publicist to Yelp it out for you, k? Thxbye.)

Anywhoo, Kris’s ‘rents got plenty of one-on-one time with the reigning Kardashian, and reports indicate that the chat involved “get to know you type stuff like, ‘This is who I am and what I’m about.’” (We’re surprised that took a whole 60 minutes…but we digress.) Since Kris and Kim seem to be putting off the nesting vibe, Moonit’s ready to find out if they’re a solid match or just a Kim-dates-another-pro-athlete snafu.

According to their birth dates, Kim (born on October 21, 1980) and Kris (born on February 6, 1985)—otherwise known as “Huggy and Smoochy”—are in dutch with the “PDA Police.” It’s pretty “refreshing to see two people who genuinely dig each other so much and complement each other so well,” and the only downside seems to be some stubble burn. Although it’s “kind of cute that they can’t keep their hands off each other,” we hope they’ll “break the lip lock and come up for air once in a while.”

Still, it’s great that they balance each other’s personalities—he “expresses his interests passively, which tends to work well since she’s pretty assertive”—and that they’re fully “emotionally synched.” In fact, they’re so well aligned that they “have the potential to create a fun, affectionate world for each other…we wouldn’t put it past them to design their own personalized wedding bands.”

Which reminds us: “Speaking of the big ‘M,’ holy matrimony may be around the corner. And since they tend to collaborate well (and they’ve got so much love to go around), kids would be a great idea.” Kim with a baby bump? Kris as a devoted dad? Not totally out of the realm of possibilities.

The Roommate hits theaters this week, and if you missed the trailer during one of its 18,000,000,000 prime-time airings, we shall get you up to speed. Essentially, thanks to the infallible college roommate lottery, former Friday Night Lights-er Minka Kelly is saddled with her doppleganger, Gossip Girl star Leighton Meester.

After a promising beginning, Meester does her absolute best to terrorize the crap out of Kelly. It sounds like pretty standard horror fare, but since you’ve got to draw from somewhere to pull off convincing BFFs-turned-arch-nemeses, Moonit’s decided to see if there’s any method to this acting.

According to their birth dates, Leighton (born on April 9, 1986) and Minka (born on June 24, 1980) have quite a feisty real-life relationship. Although they’re “likely to be tight,” they’re also prone to “bickering all the time.” It can be tough because it feels like no matter how hard Leighton tries, “she just can’t seem to get through” to Minka.

The problem lies in their inherent differences; Leighton’s “intuitive, impulsive and works from her gut,” while Minka’s more “practical and rational.” We know it “can be aggravating to deal with someone whose approach to the world [is 180°] off,” but Leighton should consider “calmly talking through any issues that crop up” rather than getting all “Single White Female” on Minka.

And considering that this movie is essentially an SWF remake for the Gen Z crowd, could this be a “life imitates art” situation?  Let’s hope The Roommate screenplay wasn’t inspired by some real-life Leighton-Minka drama.

Moonit urges them to “look out–if they let the tension build, this relationship might not weather the storm.” But “once they learn to choose their battles and stop sweating the stupid stuff,” they actually have potential to become “lifelong friends.”

On the co-star front, it turns out there’s more than a little friendly competition lurking behind the scenes. According to their professional relationship analysis, it’s “like a good ol’-fashioned backstabbing is right around the corner.” In this relationship, Leighton and Minka both “need to keep their eyes wide open…they’re definitely going to encounter some obstacles that’ll test their commitment to each other.”

Watch your backs, ladies!

When Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds got hitched after a split second of togetherness, that had us thinking he took a cue from The Proposal and decided it was high time to get his own green card. Then the two lovebirds got married and all appeared to be well.

That is, until Scarlett snubbed her hubby at the Tony Awards last year. On hearing her name announced as Best Featured Performance as an Actress winner, ScarJo didn’t waste any time jumping out of her seat like she was shot out of a cannon, and Ryan didn’t get as much as a knowing glance, a hug or a peck on the cheek.

See what Ryan’s relationship potential is like with his Proposal co-star Sandra Bullock…

So we weren’t all that surprised when they announced their separation due to “distance” and “scheduling conflicts” (original, we know). But why are they making bi-coastal public appearances together then? When you’re ironing out a divorce settlement, you don’t want to hang your dirty laundry up to dry. Here’s why we’re rooting for them to stay in each other’s lives.

According to their birth dates, this relationship is the kind you usually see depicted on the cover of those ridiculous romance novels with Fabio front and center, but these two are the real deal. This kind of physical attraction would be enough to get Ryan (born October 23, 1976) and Scarlett (born November 22, 1984) through any speed bumps that lie ahead…like those divorce papers flying around.

But they also find creative ways to keep the romance going strong even when it’s tough to do. Oddly enough, Ryan’s the one who cracks the whip that initiates all this sappy stuff. Although Scarlett tends to take the more passive role when it comes to the cute relationship ideas, she’s down for whatever he comes up with.

See what’s in store for your relationships on Moonit!

Not only does this make for a great combo when it comes to dating, but Ryan and Scarlett would also do pretty well for themselves as good friends and co-workers.  Ryan and Scarlett have what it takes to stick it out if they choose to give it another try: red-hot attraction, true love, humility… and a damned good sense of humor.

Last Valentine’s Day, everyone’s favorite blonde Christina Applegate quietly got engaged to long-term boyfriend/Porno for Pyros bassist Martyn LeNoble. (Doesn’t his name make him sound like he should be one of The Three Musketeers? Or a vampire? Or something? Gotta love the Dutch.)

There’s no wedding date on the horizon just yet, but Christina and Martyn got busy on the baby-making front. The engaged couple welcomed baby girl Sadie Grace this past week. Guess Christina wasn’t kidding when she said “Babies… not lots of babies, but a couple” were on her mind last year.

Now we’re really rooting for these two to make it official, that way we can start cracking the “married with children” jokes. So are they destined for a better marriage than the Bundys? Moonit’s on the case.

See who else got engaged on Valentine’s Day.

According to their birth date analysis, it’s quite the “you complete me” situation–minus the cheese factor. Christina (born on November 25, 1971) and Martyn (born on April 14, 1969) are, “totally synced up on physical, emotional and social levels.”

And to sweeten the pot, “their couple-ness actually attracts good fortune and big paydays.” That could very well be the case for the award-winning actress; she’s turning into quite the rom-com side-kick with movies like Going the Distance under her belt.

Moonit warns the couple that, “this kind of mutual awesomeness may be a first for you both, so don’t get weirded out when even your friends and family are rooting for you…make this thing legal.” Their readout asserts that, “if the mutual bank accounts and thumbs up from loved ones aren’t enough visible proof of compatibility, take it from us: these two legitimately make each other better people.” That makes sense, considering Christina has publicly credited Martyn for giving her the strength to win her 2008 battle against breast cancer.

Find out what’s in store for your relationships on Moonit!

Annette Bening has been kicking butt and taking names for a while now, but with her fourth Oscar nomination for The Kids Are Alright, we have to hand it to her. Not only is she a top-notch actress and a caring mom, but she also managed to tame the beast that is Warren Beatty. The two have been married for almost 20 years, which is quite a change from Warren’s former persona. It’s ancient history now, but Warren once rivaled Wilt Chamberlain and Gene Simmons for what we’ll delicately refer to as “carousing.”

If we were speaking less delicately, we might call him a hedonistic manslut. Dude hooked up with everyone from Cher to Joan Collins to Diane Keaton to Mary Tyler Moore to Stephanie Seymour to Madonna. (And if you count the people Madonna hooked up with, Warren’s probably vicariously slept with most of Hollywood and all of the NBA.) Sexual histories notwithstanding, Warren and Annette have been thick as thieves for two decades, so what helped Beatty make the switch from dudeskank to devoted husband? Moonit’s on the case.

According to their romantic assessment, Annette (born on May 29, 1958) and Warren (born on March 30, 1937) “immediately knew they shared a thirst for excitement, a longing for adventure, and a lust for life.” (Given Warren’s tawdry past, that’s saying a lot.) Even better, they “tend to get lucky when they’re around each other,” so a big Vegas win—or multiple Oscar noms—are kind of par for the course.

These two have felt an “insta-bond” since they first met, so “it’s a good thing they can work well together as a team.” When you combine “his optimism” and her “boundless energy,” “things can get chaotic.” Luckily, their partnership extends to both the good and the bad; “they may need to team up more often than they think—with their need for action, someone’s going to have to bail them out at the end of the night.”

All said, “this can be an exciting (and possibly exhausting) combination, but we’re pretty confident they’ll thoroughly enjoy themselves and get a whole lot done when they’re together.” As far as we’re concerned, as long as the accolades and awards keep rolling in and the debauchery stays private, we don’t see much to find fault with.

George Clooney’s a touchy subject. For a time, it seemed like the world was pretty much ready to knife-fight any aspiring Clooney love interest, so we were especially surprised when Italian model-turned-actress Elisabetta Canalis decided that she was here to stay. Although the media tried to slam her, Canalis managed to rise above the trash talk, and has kept George’s heart a-flutter since 2009.

But now, after a surprising admission on CNN’s “Piers Morgan Tonight,” we wonder how fluttery the couple can really be. Basically, George confirmed that he’s not the marrying kind, which came as a big ol’ shock to Canalis. According to reports, “she thought she was going to be the girl who would finally get George to settle down and put a ring on it.”

Yut-yoh. The rumor mill goes on to say that, “if he doesn’t ask her to marry him soon she will ask him…and if he says no, well there are plenty more fish in the ocean.” Yut-yoh times two. With all this drama, can Canalis and Clooney make things work? Moonit’s ready to find out.

According to their birth date analysis, George (born on May 6, 1961) “might want to keep” Elisabetta (born on September 12, 1978) around. Their reading insists that Elisabetta “is well worth his time,” and that they “have a ton of potential to not only play well but also work well together; their combined energy is through the roof.”

So, what makes these two such a dynamic duo? “George has the initiative and energy needed to get anything done,” especially when combined with Elisabetta’s “ever-present optimism, planning skills and ability to charm the pants off anyone around.”  It can be “really rewarding when they accomplish things together, and it’s especially beneficial for their relationship.”

Whether George realizes this or not, Elisabetta “secretly admires the fact that he’s such a ‘doer,’” and George is “lucky to have someone like her to keep him motivated all the time.”

Sounds pretty good, right? There’s even more goodness: these two have “the ability to bring out the absolute best in each other, whether it’s working on a project, planning a wedding or trip, playing on a team, making a home improvement or raising kids.” Could the vocally wedding-shy bachelor make an exception? Sigh. Let’s keep our fingers crossed.